There are many ingredients to success. Having talent and hard work are probably two of the most important ones. However, a hidden constituent is almost as important as these two, if not more crucial. This is confidence.

Many people with talent and hard work exist but fail to achieve their potential due to a lack of confidence. Conversely, there are also quite a few people with little skill but achieve success through hard work and confidence.

Confidence is not always easy to develop. However, when you practice these seven tricks, we guarantee that they will definitely improve to unstoppable levels!

1. Brave your fears!
Fear is a mighty double-edged sword in life. Fears keep you safe, alert you of possible risks and spare you from physical, mental and emotional pain. Without this kind of alarm system, your body and brain wouldn't last a week, let alone a whole lifetime. However, like an actual alarm system in any house or car, the only goal of fear is to help protect you. It does not help you when it's keeping out something good. 

If you are hoping to develop more confidence over assertiveness, the chances are that you are letting your fear control you, who you are and who you are going to become. Just about every situation has something to be scared of, but somehow you can navigate some incredibly dangerous situation with ease. 

Think about these two scenarios - crossing the street and public speaking. In the first, it easily can get injured or killed if you are hit by a car. But most people would face a busy street before they ever do a speech in front of a crowd. Why is that? 

The concept of control is a big part of this. But most of the crippling fear and anxiety stems from a simple lack of practice. You probably learnt how to cross the street when you were a kid and crossed it many times over. This significantly more dangerous situation isn't so scary because you know it and have practised it. You know precisely how to avoid getting hurt. If you have only spoken in public one or two times, you are probably just as scared as when you were crossing the street for the first time. 

At the end of the day, your most influential and compelling fear is what you don't know. When you don't understand something, even minor risks like stuttering or messing up during your speech seem so terrifying that you never even try.  So, if you are hoping to build confidence, re-program your own psyche by confronting your fears. You should start small but push yourself to step out of your comfort zone. Try getting familiar with things you don't understand, and eventually, they won't scare you anymore. 

2. Own your strengths!
Many studies have shown that we remember more the negatives when compared to the positives, time and time again. A teacher may have a classful of good students who are smart and well behaved. However, she is more likely to remember one bold and naughty student compared to the rest. Similarly, a restaurant or a business may have a single bad review out of hundreds of good one. You will still avoid the place because of the one negative comment because your brain is naturally programmed to hone in on negativity. 

You look for other people's flaws and prefer to criticise instead of compliment because you are instinctively drawn to negativity. And you extend this to yourself as well. You put yourself down more often than appreciate yourself! Here is where the phrase 'you are your own worst enemy' becomes relevant. And this will impede your confidence. 

However, if you begin to look at your strengths and make a habit of appreciating them, it will improve your confidence. Your confidence relies on how you pay attention to your talents, achievements and advantages. By simply committing a little time each day to remind yourself of your strengths, you can boost your self-esteem and begin developing the confidence you have been looking for. 

3. Isolate your weaknesses!
While focusing on your strengths, as earlier discussed, is undoubtedly helpful, the truth is that negativity isn't going to disappear from your life. Even people who reinforce their strengths every day can quickly fall apart because someone insulted their looks, capabilities or mocked their intelligence. 

So, how do you avoid suffering the same fate? After understanding your strengths and building that initial foundation of confidence, you should begin to recognise your own weak spots. It is also essential that you accept that there are some things that you will never be able to change —for example, the colour of your skin, your gender, your voice etc. So there is no point in wasting time and effort thinking about how to fix it. So instead, shift your attention to the things you can change and find ways to gradually address those weaknesses in a way to make you stronger. 

Crucially, throughout this process, you must remember that your strengths define you far more than your weaknesses, even if you feel it is the other way around. 

Learning how to accept criticism truly is one of the most challenging things in life. So when it happens, separate your weaknesses and the things you can, you should again separate your weaknesses into the things you can change and things you cannot. By accepting that you, like everyone else, have both kinds of flaws, you can slowly but surely build your inner strengths and self-esteem. 

4. Set attainable goals!
If you have trouble finding ways to remind yourself of your strengths consistently, you can use step-by-step goal setting to give you something tangible to be proud of. Goal setting is beneficial in every aspect of life, be it career success, mental health or fitness. 

Most people don't seem to develop themselves emotionally using lists, deadlines and resolutions. But this kind of confidence-building can work wonders for you. By essentially creating daily or weekly short-term goals for you to achieve, you can give your progress a physical shape, allowing you to compare where you were to where you are regularly. 

When you see your progress frequently, it will encourage you even further until you have grown more than you ever thought you ever could. By breaking down substantial long term goals into a series of easily attainable short term goals, you will be more motivated and eventually enhance your confidence significantly. 

5. Help someone!
Altruism is a much-debated topic these days. Some people think that doing nice things doesn't count if you are also helping yourself in the process. While some may argue endlessly about whether any generous act is selfless, you can and should do things like donating or volunteering as a way to build confidence. Even if you cannot dedicate much time or money, by simply putting up the efforts to help someone else, even in a small manner, you know you mattered to that person. No one can ever take that away from you. 

Volunteering can provide you with a sense of purpose, improve your social skills, relieve stress and inject a healthy dose of positivity into your life. It also doesn't hurt that volunteering stimulates oxytocin, also known as the compassion hormone, usually released when hugging or cuddling a loved one. You might not be volunteering purely out of the goodness of your heart, but there is nothing wrong with improving yourself and your community at the same time. 

6. Stop comparing!
This destructive habit has become a mainstay of people who struggle with insecurity and general lack of confidence in recent years. With access to countless pictures of beautiful people with fantastic lifestyles, it is easy to start comparing. After seeing their half a million euros sports car or the weekly vacations to a private island, you may begin to focus on all the things they have that you don't. This can be detrimental to your self-confidence because those fancy expensive things start to seem like a necessity to you to climb up the social ladder.  

The next part might sound a bit cliché, but it couldn't be more accurate. Every person is unique and has the potential to make their own kind of success. There is no point in comparing yourself with other people because you will never be them. You will only ever be you. So embrace the gifts you do have and use them to the fullest as only you can. 

7. Look confident!
The final trick on this list is by far the most straightforward. But that doesn't mean it's not as impactful as the rest. For the most part, people, especially strangers, are unintentionally shallow, judging you based on how you work way before they ever pay attention to what's on your inside. And this isn't because people don't care about your personality. It's just how our brains work. 

When we first meet someone, our brains start moving in overdrive to turn the small pieces of information into a working model that explains who the other persons are. Frequently, most of the signals we have to go off are physical. We have to make all kinds of personal assumptions to answer a simple question: Are they going to hurt me, or do they seem friendly? 

Modifying your appearance and body language affects how people behave toward you and changes how you conceive yourself. Straightening your back in a public place makes people act more confidently because it changes how you perceive it. By dressing well or taking care of yourself, and maintaining an open stance, you can tell yourself and the world that you got the confidence!

While confidence is natural to some, it does not mean that you cannot build it to an unstoppable level, just because you are not born with it. It is an attitude that can be learnt and I hope that these tricks will help you with it. You need to start taking one trick at a time and practice it to a sustainable level before adding the next one. Begin with whichever one feels most easy to do and sustain it for a few weeks before adding another one. Start slowly and don’t be in a hurry. Be systematic in your approach and remain focused on the choice you made.

Let us know through your comments below if any of these tricks have already worked for you! Or if you have not tried any, kindly start them and let us know later what it has done for you! We will love to hear from you and your journey.

Namaste!

Dr Kausthub Desikachar

Mental health is very vital for our overall wellbeing. There are many ways you can seek help to deal with mental health issues. Psychotherapy, Psychiatry and Psychoanalysis are the more conventional approaches. However, there are other methods like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) that can also be an effective treatment. However, treatment of mental health needs a holistic approach and should include changes in nutrition, lifestyle etc.

Yoga Therapy has also come to be recognised as an effective complementary treatment to support those with mental health issues. Meditation is among one of the more effective tools of Yoga to strengthen the mind and help alleviate many of the symptoms of mental health issues.

Choose a method that is most suitable to you and that which is easily accessible. No matter which line of healing you choose to pursue, it is important that you don’t delay seeking treatment. Also please note that you are not alone in this journey and there is appropriate help available if you seek it!

Dr. Kausthub Desikachar also assists many clients in their healing journey that includes mental health issues. He offers insightful mentoring through private consultations, which can be taken either face-to-face or online . To book a session with him, kindly visit his private consultations page by clicking here>

If you are curious to know who is Dr Kausthub Desikachar, kindly click here>

Please note: This article is written for educational purposes only and is based on the personal opinion of the author as well as information gathered through research that others have done on these topics. It is not a substitute for professional advice. Rather, it is meant for reflective self-guidance purposes only. We strongly recommend that you always follow your intuition in deciding what is best for you!

We are thrilled to announce a new course for September 2021 titled Empower your Self! The Power of meditation to embody your true nature!

Dr Kausthub Desikachar is the successor and current lineage holder of the classical Yoga tradition of T Krishnamacharya & TKV Desikachar. He is an acclaimed yoga teacher, yoga therapist, healer and spiritual adviser. His objectives include the sharing of the authentic teachings of Yoga to the modern era, as well as building bridges between different healing modalities to promote physical, emotional social and spiritual health.

He is the founder of Viniyoga Pte. Ltd. and also the co-founder of Krishnamacharya Healing & Yoga Foundation, India, and the founder and president of Europe based KHYF International.

Dr Kausthub Desikachar is a champion of women’s empowerment and guides many of his female students to embody their inner strength. To view his interviews with Viniyoga Women, visit this page here - https://www.viniyoga.com.sg/viniyoga-women

He also offers a Mantra blog, where students can listen to different Mantras from the Vedic Tradition. To benefit from this, visit here - https://www.viniyoga.com.sg/mantra

Dr Kausthub Desikachar also assists many clients in their healing journey that includes mental health issues. He regularly writes articles on Mental Health issues and these can be found here - https://www.viniyoga.com.sg/mental-health

Being an amazing Yoga Therapist and Spiritual guide, Dr Kausthub Desikachar also offers insightful mentoring through private consultations, which can be taken either face-to-face or online. To book a session with him, kindly visit his private consultations page by clicking here>

To view his other Yoga teaching page, visit here https://www.kausthub.yoga/

Apart from Yoga Teaching, Kausthub is also an avid photographer, inspirational writer and poet. To view, some of his inspirations, visit the website www.kausthubdesikachar.com